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RektHub
March 31, 2023

Welcome to the RektHub, Say goodbye to FOMO and hello to FOMR – Fear of Missing RektHub!

In today’s post:

  • BRICS creates MACE: 5 countries, 1 digital currency - is there a new crypto sheriff in town?

  • Ledger's funding jackpot: €100M for cold wallet company 💰🔒

  • Binance faces legal heat from CFTC: will the world's biggest exchange dance its way out of trouble? 💃🔥

That's my secret… your funds are always SAFU!

Rekt’s Punchlines

Brazil, Russia, India, China, & South Africa (BRICS) Working on Developing ‘New Currency’. New sh*tcoin in town?

Move over, greenback – there's a new currency in town! Brazil, Russia, India, China, and South Africa (BRICS) are putting their heads together to create a digital currency called MACE.

Apparently, these five countries have had enough of the U.S. dollar hogging the limelight, and want to reduce their dependence on it by creating their own stablecoin. It's still early days, but the BRICS gang hopes MACE will be a hit for cross-border transactions, and maybe even give the dollar a run for its money (pun intended). So, will MACE be the new cool kid on the crypto block? I guess you could say they're laying the foundation for a whole new financial structure! 🏗️💵

Crypto's Fort Knox: Ledger Locks Down €100 Million in Funding 💰🔒 Not your keys not your coins!

Crypto hardware wallet maker Ledger pocketed the lion's share of a whopping $109 million (€100 million) funding round, courtesy of investment firm 10T Holdings.

The Paris-based company plans to splurge on expanding its offerings and services, like concocting new wallet gizmos and launching a fancy software-as-a-service (SaaS) platform. Boasting a cool 4 million users worldwide, Ledger aims to cement its rep as the top dog for secure, user-friendly digital asset storage and management!

Binance's Legal Foxtrot: CFTC Cranks Up the Heat on Crypto's Dance Floor 🔥💃

Binance finds itself in a legal tango with the Commodity Futures Trading Commission (CFTC). The CFTC has filed a spicy lawsuit against the world's largest cryptocurrency exchange, accusing it of operating an unregistered futures platform and failing to implement adequate anti-money laundering measures.

To make matters worse, the suit alleges that Binance has been dancing around the Bank Secrecy Act by not establishing an effective customer identification program. If Binance can't find its rhythm in this high-stakes dance-off, it could severely impact its operations and set a precedent for future regulatory actions against other crypto platforms. 🤔 

Tweet Highlights

With US government putting more pressure on crypto Elizabeth Warren is building an anti-crypto army. Anyway, here’s a good response to that:

Do Kwon ‘McLovin’ caught with with fakes documents including passports from Costa Rica and Belgium as well as a Hawaiian driver's license. ❌ 

That’s how you 🟠 💊 normies

US government sold 9861 Bitcoin this month, but apparently, the crypto market is still saying "HODL my beer" with a 19% BTC price increase.

Bitcoin Corner

Greenpeace recently devised a plan change Bitcoin's code, sparking curiosity about whether they've been in touch with Bitcoin's CEO already. Before embarking on this endeavor, we suggest they read "The Blocksize War," as history has a knack for repeating itself, particularly in this instance.

When Greenpeace's Twitter campaign to alter the code backfired, they decided to collaborate with artists to create a piece of art symbolizing the environmental harm caused by Bitcoin. However, their attempt to protest Bitcoin's environmental impact unintentionally became one of the most compelling advertisements for it we've seen in some time.

The 'Skull Satoshi' artist later conceded that they had mistakenly blamed Bitcoin mining for climate change. Talk about a plot twist! Discover more about this intriguing story in this Twitter thread.

Notable mentions

  • Binance's support sends TUSD's daily trading volume soaring over $1B

  • FTX EU Creates Dedicated Site to Provide Refunds to its Customers

  • Trump NFT Sales Increase by More Than 400% as He Faces Legal Issues

  • Uniswap V3's no-fork license is set to expire on April 1st, 2023

  • MicroStrategy Pays Off Silvergate Loan, Buys More Bitcoin

That’s all for now! Thanks for sticking with us through our witty jokes - we promise to keep it coming! Cheers to you, our awesome reader!

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